I don’t understand modern conceptions of Gender.
There, I’ve said it, I’m out. My family must be proud that at least some of my conservative upbringing won out. I’m not. It’s not an issue of me being opposed to those who are genderqueer, genderfluid, intersexed, or trans*; it’s an issue of not understanding, and frankly, not knowing where to look. I’m not comfortable asking questions. I feel like when I do ask them, I end up being more hurtful than helpful, and that’s not what I aim to do.
Gender is a huge issue within the greater Pagan/Polytheist community – just look at the controversy at PantheaCon. Look at questions of duality and of sexuality in a group of faiths that don’t consider sex (recreational or procreational) a taboo. As much as I want to hide, I can’t anymore, because in the past few months, understanding gender outside the binary has become an issue that touches my friends and faith, and through them, me.
The balance of duality was one of the many things that drew me to my initial path in Wicca, and it’s strange to be leaving it after so long, but I want to have better discourse with friends who I have unintentionally hurt, and with the Pagan/Polytheist community at large. If y’all are willing to share your own understandings of gender and help point the way to better understanding, I’d appreciate it.
Senebty,
Khen
Words of a Fledgling Kemetic 
If you’d like to talk with me some time about this issue, I’m here, you are welcome to PM me on the forums or FB… And bonus, I don’t get offended easily. 😉
I’m not sure that I’m the best person to ask, but you can ask me any questions you have, and I can do my best to give some insight.
In the Kemetic world it’s a bit easier. There isn’t the male vs female, goddesses are for females, gods are for males attitude you see in other traditions. So it just doesn’t have the same political overtones. I just found this post about monotheism which mentions gender attitudes and possible reasons for them:
http://skepticlawyer.com.au/2011/10/19/why-did-the-middle-east-select-for-monotheism-guest-post-by-lorenzo/
I know Zabet has a multi-axis diagram that might be worth looking at, involving your identity, who you are attracted to, how much, etc.
Basically, treating people with respect is the place to start.